Back at my apartment from my walk in the park, I begin to Thích Nhất Hạnh my movements, performing every action–the pouring of water, the consumption of food, the taking off and putting on of clothes, and so on–with the greatest of care, deliberate slowness, sensing, after dropping my iPhone when removing it from my pants pocket, an absolute need to focus as completely as possible on the Now …

… passing through Ikebukuro Station, I find myself walking in the direction of a lone man in business garb (slacks, suit jacket, button shirt, tie) standing in front of an otherwise deserted bank of ticket machines as he rails, raves, screams full out at no one or everyone or phantoms (is he saying something about gaijins–foreigners?)
I note but don’t accede to an impulse to smirk as I start moving away at an angle, manage to feel some empathy, compassion for his suffering …

A Friend’s Distress

Posted by VERITAS
“My god you look strung out!”
“I can’t tell you how much this has stressed me.”
“No need—it’s manifest.” In his expression, most of all, which has turned fatigue-lined and jowly, a far cry from its usual perkiness.
And no wonder he’s stressed, given how much, according to him, he valued the smartphone message exchanges he had with his teenage daughter, no matter how trivial many of them were; no matter that in some she told him “Fuck off!” in exactly those words.
The messages that he lost from his phone with a single accidental swipe and/or tap the night before.
“I was hoping someone at the Apple Store Genius Bar could tell me a way to restore them, but it seems there’s none.” He mumbles this holding his head in his hands, then looks up at me with a slight smile. “Unless I can get her to lend me her iPhone, then take screenshots of all of them and send those to myself.” Thinking of this possibility seems to mollify him a bit and, after I wish him luck, our conversation turns to other topics, even as I’m left admiring and wondrous at a father’s love for his daughter.

Karmic CR

Posted by VERITAS
Thanks, I’m guessing, to that blasted CR I mistakenly offed (as in off-with-its-head-ed, only by mistake), I threw out my lower back … or worse; i.e., not just the muscles but, according to an x-ray I had taken, the spinal alignment, at least assuming that when I quickly moved the refrigerator in order to get at the CR, that that’s when the alignment got thrown off, and I did, in fact, feel something at the time, when I was tugging and pulling on the refrigerator to move it as quickly as possible, feeling angry at and predatory towards the CR as I did so.

So highly karmic!


Posted by VERITAS
I dream I’m teaching some sort of math class to high school age students and I suddenly realize it’s time for some sort of mid-class break and that I may have given the students far too long to do the in-class assignment I’d given them.
Then, as I leave the classroom for the break, I realize I’m completely naked and that the students have been seeing me that way — though they hadn’t given any indication of this; had seemed in fact to basically be ignoring me — so I go into some sort of side room that has an earthen floor — with the floor mossy and some grass growing from it; sort of a run-down room, with warped, unpainted, wood plank walls that let in only a modicum of sunlight through the cracks between the planks but still I don’t have a bad feeling about the room itself even as I frantically try to get into some clothes — which somehow seem to be at hand — as quickly as possibly while thinking how I’m going to handle the class when I return to the classroom … and that’s when I wake up …

… Thank god — or the subconscious-receptive state of my mind or whatever — I started remembering the dream after several confused-feeling seconds during which I didn’t think I would … confused-feeling and with a feeling, as well, of great tiredness, because, it seems, remembering the dream immediately resolved these feelings, bringing, in place of tiredness and confusion, feelings of restfulness and clarity.
… And I had a fantastic hard-on to boot (but not due to any of the dream’s contents, as far as I recall anyway–just to my regular, morning wake-up hard-on coming through big time with the resolution of the negative energy situation due to remembering the dream).

Resonance of Suffering

Posted by VERITAS
As I brush my teeth I hear in the bass resonances of the water American bombers overhead, ready to rain napalm fire on Tokyo …